Offensive Words

Some words are offensive and not used.

Some are used by certain groups, but not by others.

The N-word comes to mind as a word that has a defined ecosystem where it may flourish, and a vast region beyond the pale where it may not.

"Retarded" is another example.
Very recently I was on my way somewhere, I was late, and I lightly explained that "I was retarded." As soon as I said this, I knew it was an error, for I meant that I was retarded in time; that is, I was held back by something and lost time and was - as the man in the Bay of Biscay said when asked why he missed dinner - I was en retard. I was late.
Of course, in my neck of the woods, many young people had most recently been in the habit of using "retarded" as a synonym for "silly", "goofy", "loopy", and what have you. So by saying I was retarded, I could have seemingly been stating the obvious and asking for forgiveness and understanding due to my goofiness... sort of an obeisance one makes to the Alphas in charge, a groveling in the dirt.
I think the appointment was a haircut, and the person I talked to was my hair-whisperer (emphasis on whisp),  and as she was going to have sharp metal objects in the proximity of my carotid artery soon, it seemed best to grovel.

The N-Word is the most odd. If a family has people of various races within the close family, you have the very unusual spectacle of the linguistic divide in a very small community. Some members of the family use it, but in well-defined situations with people of well-defined relationship, and some other members do not at all.

I think it helps such situations to be stimulant-free. It is easy to offend when non compos mentis.

What we actually need is a perjorative word that cuts to the quick and can be used by everybody.

Or not... Perhaps the power of such words resides in the labyrinth of proper usage within a maze of different social and familial relationships.
Perhaps a good part of the perjorative power of offensive words comes from their difficult context and placement - the fact that if one uses such a word improperly, one could get punched in the nose.

Interesting. Personally, if I feel the need, I sing a bowdlerized version of DMX Ruff Ryders Anthem, "One, two, three, four, five...what?!"  wherein the "one" and "two" beats take the place of the offensive words.

--

gad! The latest Firefox update has made this browser almost impossible to use!
I am in a hurry to get this up before everything falls apart.